I agree with you. I also think you have a right to withdraw from a relationship after so many years of abuse. I recently scanned my uncles’ letters to my mother into the computer for her, and it was a reminder why I cut him out of my life. He is a toxic dumpster fire who is a malignant narcissist that will not change. He exalts in “debates” he feels he has won and believe me this includes his racist assertions. He licks his lips with each conversation, walking away, believing he has another notch in his cowhide whip.