I thoroughly appreciate your support, Alexainie. I’m sorry it has taken me a while to respond. After I wrote this, I was doing okay answering responses and then suddenly, I wasn’t. I had to step away from the thoughts of my brother for a little while. You’re right, David was a sweet person. He didn’t deserve to have such a rough life. I think about how close I feel to my living siblings right now, and I feel so empty thinking of David and the relationship we never got to have. It sucks all of the air out of my chest to consider his life.
I obviously can’t tease apart what had the biggest impact on his life: 1) ADHD; 2) traumatic brain injury; 3) situational depression in response to poverty and family strife or to loneliness and rejection; 4) inherited mental illness; or 5) PTSD from his time in foster care. Suffice it to say, all of the above. The theme that runs through all of it is his need for proper mental health care, which he never got. There were so many opportunities to intervene, but we just don’t have an effective national mental health system.
Thank you for everything you said. It means a lot to me.